Friday, March 13, 2015

Females Are Strong As Hell!

I binged watched the new Netflix comedy Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt this past weekend and the theme song is stuck in my head…. “Unbreakable, they’re alive dammit. Females are Strong as Hell!” Best TV Show theme song EVER. Leave it to Tina Fey to finally put in words what we all know. Females are STRONG AS HELL! Weaker sex, my ass. It takes an unlimited amount of strength to do the things women do.  I’m not even talking about giving birth cause we win hands down with that one. I’m talking about the core of steel that enables a woman to be a woman. There are a million things we do on any given day that should earn us more than one day of recognition. I mean just being able to wear a pair of six inch heels for more than 5 minutes is a test of endurance and courage.  

By the way, don’t ever try to run in six inch heels. I did it once, yep, just once cause I fell out of one shoe and almost broke my ankle in the other shoe. My boss who witnessed this stupidity shook his head and said, “You know you take your life into your hands every time you put those shoes on.”

Back to my point, Woman are strong as hell.  On any given day we are called upon to accomplish tasks that require the strength of ten men… not physical strength but a bone deep emotional strength.  

Here are a few instances that come to mind:

1.       Being supportive instead of trying to fix it.
You know what I’m talking about. You are sitting with a friend who is pouring their heart out to you. Their boyfriend is being a jerk, doesn’t value them, isn’t paying enough attention to them. As a woman you know your job in that moment is not to fix even though you know EXACTLY what they should do. Your job is to be supportive and attentive and comforting. It takes an enormous amount of strength to NOT give advice. Giving advice is easy. We all have opinions and most of us like sharing them. I know I do. But to keep your opinion to yourself in that moment and instead be the person your friend needs you to, that takes strength. 

2.       Being there even when you would rather be… anywhere else.
Your son is singing in the school choir. They are AWFUL but he is so very proud to be standing on that stage belting out ROAR by Katy Perry with 20 other tone deaf 8 year olds. Do you run from the auditorium? No! You clap and cheer and are genuinely excited to be able to experience this assault on your hearing because you love him. And we all know that the strength of a Mother’s love is the single strongest force on earth. 

3.       Being kind and patient when you just want to scream.  
Have you ever tried to dress a 2 year old? It’s torture, like Guatanamo Bay level torture. They should employ this tactic to elicit confessions from criminals. Give them a couple toddlers and tell them to get them dressed, pants, shirt, sweater, socks, shoes, jacket. I guarantee that within 5 minutes they will be crying and begging to confess.  The toddler will only be mildly distressed.  It requires a Herculean amount of strength to maintain a calm and patient façade when what you really want to do is scream and run from the room. Why do you think we see so many pictures of kids in nothing but diapers captioned, “Daddy was in charge today.”  Because men will give up, throw in the towel and let them run around sans clothes. 

4.       Being loving and gentle when you feel anything but.
This to me is the truest expression of strength. When you are so angry you can see red, when your heart is torn to shreds by the person you love the most in the world and you still manage to take a deep breath and respond with love and compassion. And not that fake, put upon “understanding” but genuine love. The kind that says, I don’t understand where you are coming from or even why you are behaving in this way but I love you and in this moment choose to act from that place. This is nearly impossible on the best of days but I have seen women do it over and over again, with their children, their mates, their friends. It is something purely female, the ability to empathize and act in love even when we are bleeding internally.

You see strength isn’t power, might, or exerting of pressure. Strength is most often the absence of those things, the ability to step outside of ourselves and our circumstances and choose to be kind, patient, loving, gentle and compassionate.


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