Showing posts with label July 10. Show all posts
Showing posts with label July 10. Show all posts

Friday, July 10, 2015

You find the most interesting things when you are moving


I am cleaning and packing this month in preparation to move apartments. When moving my philosophy is always "Why move it if you don't need it." I'm not a pack rat by any stretch of the imagination but I am always fascinated by the things I discover I have held onto. In the pile of notes and letters I was going thru earlier this week I found the list of things. . 

If I remember correctly I wrote this particular list after a therapy session where I was trying to articulate what I felt was missing in my house growing up and what I was hoping for when I had my own family.

  • Daily activities together - outdoor and indoor
  • Dinner together all week nights
  • Atmosphere of openness - free to say what you are thinking and feeling
  • Feelings of security, stability and safety
  • Unconditional love - no need for perfection or fear of not being love. Kids are encouraged to be themselves and are not reflections of us. They are people in their own right. 
  • Displays of affection are commonplace- hugs, kisses, pats, cuddles happen every day
  • Kinds words are heard often
  • Encouragement and praise is given openly
  • We are all encouraged to find things we enjoy and supported in those pursuits
  • Organized and clean but not OCD and rigid
  • Lots of laughter and smiles
  • Family traditions developed
  • The kids always come first and are the single most important thing
  • Truly enjoy spending time together - each other's favorite person
  • Financial security!!! - College funds, Savings accounts, back up plans
  • Introduce kids to many cultures, foods and ways of thinking
  • Avoid voicing negatives about each other but own our faults and mistakes
I want to feel special and be embraced for who I am and the unique things only I can bring into a relationship. I want to be valued for my heart and humor more than my abilities. I want to matter.